Archives

George Bush (snr), i.e. the daddy of current non-elected US president, George W. Bush, when he ran for president had a big handicap. He had to shed the 'wimp' tag. This is why he chose Dan Quayle to be his running mate in 1988. Dan Quayle was no wimp, he was worse.

He was moronic to a point where it was rumoured that the CIA had been ordered to shoot the man in the event of the president's death. He was that much a security risk. Dan Quayle quickly earned a reputation for public gaffes. He once remarked, while touring some South American countries how he regretted not studying Latin while in high school. One of the main US dailies even opened a column titled "Quayle Droppings!" He provided the humour and would have I am sure provided Art Buchwald oodles of material for his column.

I like politicians to trip. They provide comic relief, which is about the best they can do by way of service to the people. I remember way back in the UNP times (also known as the "JVP times", but best described as the label-free bheehsanaya), when agitating university students, avowedly "independent" and representing only the student movement, would in the rush of enthusiasm shout "Deshapremi Janatha Vyaparayata Jayawewa". Those slip-ups were minor and largely ignored either out of fear or more typically because it was an open secret that the student movement was gamaka balaya of the JVP.

I am sure a diligent researcher would come up with millions of examples where politicians put their feet in their mouths. Most of them can be brushed aside as politics-as-usual. In other words, politicians lie, so what's new? Ronnie de Mel jumped after saying he was not going to do so. Was anyone surprised? Did it upset the numbers game that is electoral politics in any way?

Of course not. In fact "Ronnie Panee" is a perennial. It is one of the few predictable newspaper headlines during election time. It would be news only if he didn't. During the last election the JVP said "unuth epa, munuth epa, api javipeta". I don't know if the PA was "un" or "mun", but looks like the sahodarayas needed one of the two after all.

What all this boils down to is that no slogan is sacrosanct as far as the politician goes, and no enemy or friend permanent, either. Such "lapses" are common and easily forgiven and forgotten. People can promise a solution to the Tamil Question, so-called; swear to abolish the executive presidency; bring down the cost of living and a million other things and comeback 6 years later (sorry, two; no, one) and say it all over again.

Then there are the classics, the Quayle Droppings, Sri Lanka style. Even before nominations have closed, and before jockeying for spots on the national list has ceased, we had a classic. No, two classics. If you are thinking about the vesikili mouthings uttered by S. B. Dissanayake.

Election time is the time for the cleaning of cesspits. You get a lot of foul smelling stuff and since filling cesspits is what all people, regardless of colour or idealogy have to do, there's bound to be a lot of it available for throwing around. No, I am talking about two prize statements from the UNP's hadisi samuluwa held a few days ago, both from the brick-dropping mouth of UNF firebrand Rajitha Senaratne.

Since this is the time of crossovers, Rajitha bragged that a PA heavyweight was going to do a Ronnie on Monday and that another would follow on February 30! Sure, this is a leap year and therefore the adu masaya has more than 28 days.

Slip of the tongue? Just another example of human frailty? Probably, if we give him the benefit of the doubt. But I couldn't help thinking, it is an ideal ploy. Politicians can be creative about promises now. "We will abolish the Executive Presidency on June 31, Wimal Weerawansa can proclaim. "The Anti-Conversion Act will be presented in Parliament on August 32, Lokubandara can promise. "On December 58, we will finally get the independent commissions up and running," all members of the 13th Parliament can say through a joint declaration. If we elect politicians who don't know the number of days in a given month, then we probably deserve to be fed outrageous promises.

That's the bottom line.

If anyone missed Rajitha's February 30 gaffe, no one would have missed his absolute bloomer about Athula Nimalasiri Jayasinha alias "Loku Athula", the man who did the Ronnie Act a few days before Ronnie himself did it. I am sure Ranil Wickremesinghe wouldn't have been too pleased.

I do not know if it was a case of being overenthusiastic or being way out of his depth, but Senaratne while spitting venom at the JVP, forgot that one of the "Ruthless JVPers" he was referring to was seated right behind the Prime Minister. Worse, Senaratne had been in the welcoming party when Loku Athula crossed over from the PA last week.

It is one thing to point the finger at your opponents' flaws while being handicapped by the very same failings, and quite another to abuse a fully-fledged comrade, and certainly not in his presence. Not done. Loku Athula might be wondering if this is the price he has to pay for having jumped ship. I doubt it though.

Quite apart from the UNF shooting itself, there is an important lesson for all politicians here.

When crossover is the name of the game, ideologically or otherwise, you always end up with a mixed bag. The JVP, for example can't talk about the UNF's track record on corruption and the SLFP can't talk about political violence. The UNF, which is so silent on the LTTE's atrocities, can't afford to talk about the so-called "JVP Time". None of these parties, who have used and abused high profiled monks and have been the main carriers of religious agendas, Buddhist and Christian both, can fault the monks for contesting.

Of course, none of the above will prevent them from going ahead with the political free-for-all that is election campaigns. It is all in the game. Let them all understand one thing though. No one is really listening.

They are all busy laughing their guts out. So go ahead and abuse. Sling your mud. You have nothing to lose but the ground you are standing on. We will thank you come April 2. Not for generating hope. No, for providing the laughs. We sure need it. More power to the Rajitha Senaratnes of this country. What would we do without you people!

www.ceylincoproperties.com

www.ppilk.com

www.crescat.com

News | Business | Features | Editorial | Security
Politics | World | Letters | Sports | Obituaries

Produced by Lake House
Copyright © 2003 The Associated Newspapers of Ceylon Ltd.
Comments and suggestions to :Web Manager